Catching Up

I have a lot to discuss, as I've been lax in updating about my life here.

1. Clubbing in Tokyo
The weekend before I went home, I went clubbing in Rippongi (Foreigner Central of Tokyo, as well as the home of one of the best night spots in Japan). The problem with going to Tokyo for the nightlife is that you have to abandon hope of getting home that night. The trains stop at midnight, but for those of us who live out in the boonies, the last train out of Tokyo leaves around 8:30 - well before most of the clubs open. There are, in short, three options for those who want to go dancing and drinking:
A. Don't go clubbing.
B. Go clubbing and rent a hotel as close to your clubbing spots as possible. (Taxis here cost a small fortune.)
C. Stay out at the clubs until the trains start running again ... at 6 in the morning.

The last option is the most cost-effective and the least sane - in Leslie speak, it means "all sorts of fun."

I can't describe to you the feel of a Tokyo club at 3 in the morning; rather, I could try and fail. Nor could I tell you what Tokyo looks like under the early morning sun. In fact, a large portion of why I have hesitated so long in writing this entry is due to the fact that there are so many things about a clubbing all-nighter that can't be put into words. Trust me with this - should you ever have the chance to visit Rippongi and stay from sunset to sunrise, do it. If I'm still in Japan when you go, you can be assured that I'll keep you company!


2. Me, as I am.
When I went home, several people commented that I had changed a lot in my time in Japan. Fortunately, they described these changes as being good things - that I have grown more into myself, that I have realized the potential in personality, character, and confidence I showed before I left. At first, I thought these were the sorts of things one says to a person who has been gone for so long, but I recently was reminded strongly of who I was as a senior in college, and I was amazed to find just how much I had changed in the year since I'd left WashU. Again, this is something I can't describe all that easily, so I will have to abandon the idea there. I will say one more thing, though: I've faced a lot of my fears by coming out here, and have grown strong because of that. It's ... a really good thing.


3. My job
Now, to bring it down a notch, I'm afraid. Work has started again and, as of late, I've become really frustrated with my life at school. As it is the second trimester, the students have lost their "I'm going to be good this year" resolutions and are falling into their worst habits. It frustrates me greatly, which is stress on me that is close to breaking my back. I don't enjoy teaching - I'm not a great teacher, one that these kids will remember for the rest of their lives. I'm just a warm body that repeats at command and plays stupid, sometimes-entertaining games. My teachers value me for my work ethic, but the students ... well, they appreciate that my presence means they won't have to have yet another regular class. I can't inspire students the way good teachers do, and, while that doesn't mean I'm a bad teacher, I really hate doing a job that I know I can't do well.

That being said, developments in the States make me wary of returning. The economy is shot, and the trend of politics has me worried. The prospect of doing this job for another year may become more appealing as 2008 draws to a close.
I suppose there's not much of a point in worrying over it excessively now, but I have to admit that changes are in the works.