Stories from the Staff Room

I have a random memory from 3rd grade: I was walking down the halls and went past two teachers. It was either before school, after school, or during class, as there were hardly any students in the hall, so the teachers were talking fairly freely. What were they doing? Gossipping about a student. I realized, with a start, that teachers might just be the worst gossips ever, having not only the camaraderie of there being many teachers in a school but also the rich fodder of students lives to fuel the flames.

Earlier this morning, the groundskeeper found a pencil bag while doing his rounds. As it was outside of the entrance the 1st and 2nd year (7th and 8th grader) students use, he showed it to the 1st and 2nd year teachers in the staff room, saying, "If any students say they've lost their pencil case, the one I found is here."

Saito-sensei took the bag and looked inside to see if there was anything to identify the owner. He fairly quickly stated it was owned by "a boy, and a suspicious one at that." This started a flurry of comments on the case - maybe it's a girl's; no, it's too big and manly; look at the inside, what's inside; it's definitely a boy, a girl would have cuter things; there are cartoon girl charms on the outside, couldn't it be a girl's? ...

And then Saito-sensei gave his assessment: "It's definitely a boy's. The charms just show he's got some perverted thoughts." He looked around at the male teachers in the room for support, who chuckled and nodded. Not being able to resist an opportunity to tease Saito-sensei, I told him he must be hoping to see the boy come to get it so he could point and say, "Ah! There's the suspicious boy!" He laughed, some others laughed, and the staff room's conversation flowed on to other things.

It all took about 3 minutes, but it's so indicative of how teachers interact and gossip in the staff room here. Students make up most of the conversation - so-and-so was acting the fool in class today, these students are causing trouble, I don't know what so-and-so's parents are thinking, this kid is a total pervert... the list goes on. I can't imagine that it's any different from the States. If anything, it's probably worse here, as the teachers here don't have their own rooms and thus always spend time in the "teacher's lounge" / staff room, affording them greater opportunities to swap tales.

When I was younger, the idea of gossipping teachers horrified me because I feared being the subject of their talk. In the end, though, it's probably unavoidable - we spend so much of our time interacting with students who will inevitably do stupid, immature, and funny things. I will say one thing for it, though: teachers being gossips certainly is an unanticipated bridge across the culture gap!